Final Basketball Thoughts

Basketball season is over, and I have a few stuttering-related thoughts on it … and what I’m thinking for the next coaching experience … I previously wrote about coaching fourth grade boys basketball here and here.

  1. At the end of the season, my co-coach printed up awards for each of the kids, made a little speech at the post-season party (at a parent’s house) and handed them out. I didn’t know he was going to do this, and didn’t offer up any words while he was doing this. The kids and parents were happy to get the team awards, so if I’m a coach for another sport, I think it’s something I’d want to do. I think if I wrote a little script and practiced it a few times, I could pull it off without any issues. I might get stuck on the names, but instead of focusing on that, I’ll focus on my breathing, standing up straight, making eye contact, and projecting to the back of the room.
  2. After each game, my co-coach would gather the players around and talk about the one thing we did well, and one thing we could improve on. I need to have a think about this. I saw some of the other coaches doing this as well. I think I’d have to really think about the message and make sure it’s clear when I’m conveying it.
  3. Over communication is definitely key. Sending out e-mails to the parents, being clear on what the schedule would be and what they needed to do certainly made life easier. We had a few times when people didn’t show up on time, but overall it wasn’t too bad. Re-iterating what was said in an e-mail after practice also helped.
  4. Volunteering to coach was a simple and small thing — and it made a huge, huge difference in terms of my confidence. To go back to the stuttering angle — I spoke and didn’t die. I also learned all the simple things that I wrote about above — how to organize, how to direct, and how to keep kids engaged.

I wrote before that if my daughter wants to sing up for softball, I’d coach. Well, that didn’t happen. She wants to do soccer instead. And my other son wants to do soccer as well. I’ll try to do both since they need volunteers.

Before, when I didn’t accept my stuttering (as much) I would have run from these things. I’m not saying I’m running toward them now, but I’m walking. I’m still choosing to engage on my own terms.

I think it’s important to write about these things because many people may not know what they’re getting into, and they shy away from it because they think their stuttering will just take over. It won’t. And even if you ask someone (who doesn’t stutter) what they got out of it, their experience will be totally different than yours.

Stuttering Basketball Update

I wrote a few weeks back about coaching boys basketball this year. So what happened is that they put the first time coaches together, so I’m a co-coach. Which is fine with me obviously. My co-coach is a great guy who’s very much into it which is great. I’ve ended up doing most of the backend stuff — sending out e-mails to parents and putting together the line-ups for the games. And then during practices I help out with the specific drills that we’ve come up with. My co-coach actually played (I played a little intramural during high school but was obviously terrible) and so he’s got a solid idea of how moves should be done and what skills need to be worked on.

I didn’t expect the co-coaching thing to happen, but I’m honestly happy it did. It’s a better transition for me. It’s easing into it vs. being thrown in (which I’m accustomed to). I can see what is working or isn’t, what should be said or not, and adjust.

I’m having a very positive experience and not letting any stuttering get in the way. Now they are talking about spring sports and needing volunteers. And I’m not even hesitating to volunteer. If my daughter wants to do softball, I’ll happily sign up as a coach.

Stuttering basketball

So apparently the deal with being a father of young children and wanting them to play sports and do activities is that well, sometimes you have to volunteer. And that requires a little trip outside of the Comfort Zone.

It’s still early, but I’ve signed up to be a basketball coach for my fourth-grade son’s team. I have zero coaching experience. This has more to do with opportunity than stuttering, though. I have a feeling that coaching a bunch of 9 and 10-year-olds is more about getting them organized and moving in the right direction than drawing up plays and wanting to win.

Based on my stuttering experience and apprehension, how am I approaching this?

I don’t know how to run a practice, don’t know the rules inside and out, and don’t know anybody else.

Running practices: The guy who organizes the league recognizes that there are others in my same position. He’s got drills and practices already outlined and available to use. I’ll get a whistle, read up before hand, picture how it’ll play out in my mind, and should be comfortable.

Rules: Obviously the rules are available online, and then it’s about asking the guy in charge of the league what differences there might be.

Knowing others: This is the hardest part. There’s a coaches meeting in a few days, so I need to push aside my fears and try to introduce myself to others. Not sure if there will be a round of introductions or what, but I don’t want to leave there without meeting anybody.

I’ll post updates as the season goes on. I’m looking forward to a new challenge and new people.

 

Your Stuttering Pace

I don’t get to watch much (any, really) college basketball here in Saudi. But I know it’s March, and it’s almost time for the Madness. Basketball always gets me thinking about pacing. When you watch a game, you’ll almost always hear the commentators talk about who’s dictating the pace. Who’s trying to slow things down or speed things up. That things are getting out of control, so one team calls a timeout.

Nobody who stutters likes to be told to “slow down.” I think it’s stupid advice, too. But what I want is to move at my own pace.

And sometimes I want to stop.

And take a breath.

And then think.

And then take another breath.

Then think about what my speech therapist told me. Then think about my message.

And then let out my words at a comfortable pace. Not too fast, not too slow.

Very often we’re caught in a much faster, higher pressure situation than we’re comfortable with. But is it really? Ordering at the fast food counter during the lunch rush is high pressure? Seriously? Those people behind you can wait. If you give part of your order and are asked, “and?and?and?” You don’t have to rush out a response. What are they going to do if you take a few extra seconds? Kick you out? Don’t forget about the guy in front of you who stared at the menu for five minutes before figuring out what to order. And he was fluent! Do you think he cared about holding up the line? No.

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